Our Journey to Happily Ever After!

There's Always Hope

2009-05-28T15:47:00.001-07:00

Two Months Since Gotcha Day

2009-05-21T07:32:00.001-07:00

Today marks the two month anniversary of our Gotcha Day. Wow!

What an amazing two months it's been. It's hard to believe that it's only been two months because it seems like Camille's been with us for such a long time. In fact, the other day, Lauren said that she doesn't feel like Camille's adopted. According to Lauren, it feels like she's always been part of the family. Amazing to think that just 90 days ago (which seems like a lifetime), we were frustrated beyond belief, unsure of when we were going to travel, etc. I guess it's true that once the baby is in your home, you forget about all the grief you went through to get to that point.

We continue to pray for all the families out there waiting to adopt.

Two months down, and a lifetime to go.

God Bless America

2009-05-16T15:50:00.000-07:00

Camille, Miss Universe 2018.

First Post Placement Visit

2009-05-13T15:00:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was our first post-placement visit by our social worker. Regina spent all day cleaning the house spic and span, and Camille was looking particularly adorable. The meeting last about 45 minutes. We discussed our trip to the PI, how Camille is adjusting, etc. We showed the social worker the Lifebook that was given to us by the orphanage, and she seemed very impressed by it. She asked a bunch of questions about where Camille sleeps, her health, her adjustment, etc. She also answered all our questions about the formal adoption process.

All in all, the meeting was very positive. I suppose we "passed" because our social worker left wiht a big smile on her face and a very upbeat attitude.

Successful post-placement visit + Laker 40 point victory = very happy family.

The Future of the Blog

2009-05-11T13:04:00.000-07:00

As you can see, we haven't updated out blog in weeks. We'd like to update it regularly, but with five kids, we simply don't have the time. Instead, we've decided to post blogs and pictures about once a month in case anyone is still interested in our adoption journey.

Right now, we are frantically cleaning the house for our first "post placement" visit by our social worker. We will have three or four of these visits in the next six months. After each visit, our social worker will write a report to ICAB advising them of Camille's progress. If the reports are positive, ICAB will then give us their official consent to adopt Camille. We'll take that consent form and present it to the family court here in the States so that we can officially adopt Camille. Until then, we are her legal guardians, and her name is still the name that appears on her birth certificate. Sooooo ... if all goes well, she officially and legally and finally be adoption by the end of the year.

As for her adjustment, it's been great. In fact, the person with the biggest adjustment issue is 3-year old Kyle. Camille has replaced Kyle as the baby in the family, and Kyle has definitely noticed. For the first few weeks, he threw tantrums, crawled into our bed at night, and was always asking for his mommy. He's a little better now, but he's definitely still adjusting to NOT being the baby of the family.

Other things: At first, Camille was very, very particular about what she ate (and didn't eat). In fact, for the first few weeks, she'd only eat white rice. Yes, it was easy to feed her, but we were concerned about her lack of well round diet. Over time, her pickiness has gone away, and she's almost to the point where she'll eat anything in front of her. But, unlike our other kids, Camille definitely eats a lot. She eats often, a lot, and takes huge bites. Hopefully, she's just eating so she can "catch up" in size, since she was definitely on the smaller end of the height/weight charts at the doctor's office.

Camille used to afraid of swings, but now she loves them. When we first took her to the park, she freaked out when we put her on the swing. This happened two or three times. So we replaced our regular swing in the backyward with an infant-style swing shaped like a dolphin. She rode that for a while, and now we can't get her out of it. When she went to the park yesterday, she happily sat in the swing for almost the entire time!

Anyway, we have other observations that don't come to mind right now, but we'll be sure to include them in our next update. We'll also post some pictures really soon.

We finally did it....

2009-04-23T13:53:00.000-07:00

we traded in our truck for a suburban. Now we can finally fit a family of seven and also all the backpacks, sports gears, stroller, etc. Actually we can fit in a few more kids if we really wanted to. But the big question is, do we really want to? Mark is such a great sport for making our mini-van his commuter car. He's such a team player!

Let the Fanaticism Begin (Part 3)

2009-04-20T19:14:00.001-07:00

Go BRUINS!!!!

A Comic Strip Says It All

2009-04-15T21:56:00.001-07:00

Found these comic strips ... thought they were pretty appropriate. If you have any you want to add, please comment to this post with the link to the comic strip/cartoon.

Possible Breakthrough ...

2009-04-11T22:24:00.001-07:00

For the past three weeks, we've been trying really, really hard and super-duper consistently to teach Camille to say "please". This has turned out to be a very frustrating task because until two days or so, she flat out refused to say "please". We're not sure if this was a language thing, a comprehension thing or what. We tried lots of different tricks. For example, we'd point to each kid one at at time and have them say "pleeeaaassseee". Then, we'd point to Camille hoping that she'd do the same. Nada. Sometimes even a shaking of her head as if to say, "No way, Jose!" We even bribed our kids, offering $1 to the one that could teach Camille to say "please". We even had to be kind of mean ... denying her whatever it was that she was asking for because she didn't say "please".

Well, today, we gave Lauren a dollar because Camille consistently said "please" when asked. She actually says, "eeaaasssee", ... but we think she gets the concept. We'll see if she continues this tomorrow and forever. We're crossing our fingers.

We also picked eggs at the local park and painted eggs at home. Today, she met Uncle Mel, and tomorrow, she'll meet lots more relatives while we celebrate Easter.

Happy Easter, everyone!

Disneyland!

2009-04-11T21:46:00.000-07:00

To celebrate Camille's first week in America, we decided to take her to the Happiest (and most expensive) place on Earth -- DISNEYLAND! Camille was a trooper the entire day ... never crying or getting overly restless. In fact, despite the crowds and long lines, all five kids were amazingly cooperative. We had two strollers, and at one point, we had two kids on each stroller while the fifth walked close by. Quite an adventure. Thanks to Ate Rowena for hookin' us up!

One cool thing that happened was that during the High School Musical 3 show, Lauren was chosen to dance with the performers. Since she LOVES HSM, she was clearly in heaven!

Here are some other cool pics:

The All American Past-Time

2009-04-08T15:09:00.000-07:00

Today, Camille did what every red-blooded American child does -- go to Chuck-E-Cheese! That's called "instant Americanization". Camille had fun observing, observing, observing. Although she didn't like riding any of the rides, she definitely enjoyed putting tokens into the machines, then walking away. That didn't last long. She also enjoyed going up and down the slide, and exploring in the over-head tunnels.

Get used to his place, Camille. With all the birthday parties we attend, this place is basically our home away from home.

Here she is in her first of many matching outfits with her Ate Lauren:

Let the Fanaticism Begin (Part 2)

2009-04-08T13:39:00.001-07:00

Go Lakers!!!!

Earrings for Camille

2009-04-05T20:35:00.000-07:00

After church, we headed to the mall to get Camille's ears pierced. Not easy. As you can see, it started off easy enough ...
until she realized that something weird was about to happen ...
then the big time wailing began ...
But after a few minutes, the crying stopped, and the smile was back ... earrings and all.

Our First Adventure

2009-04-05T02:35:00.001-07:00

Today, we travelled outside the home for the first time as a party of SEVEN. We went to Daniel's Championship basketball game which was played at a nearby school. We have a minivan, which seats seven. We put three car seats in the back row, Jason and Lauren in the two middle row seats, and Mommy and Daddy in the front. Getting the two littlest ones in and out of the back row will take a lot of getting used to. Before, to get Kyle in and out of the car, we could simply reach in from the outside. But now, we have to literally get into the car to get Camille in and out of her carseat. Not too bad right now ... but, of course, today it wasn't raining and there were no backpacks, sports equipment, instruments, or grocery bags on the floor of the van. There's got to be an easier way. If it doesn't get easier, we may need to upgrade to a giant, gas guzzling "van" van ... or maybe a Suburban (assuming I win the lottery or if someone can spot me $40,000). Maybe we can get a school bus ala the Partridge Family. Hmmm ... Any big car suggestions, anyone?

Anyway, Camille did as well as expected at Daniel's basketball game. Most of the team moms knew that we were adopting, so when Reg and Camille walked into the gym, they were greeted with quite a bit of enthusiasm. When the game started, Camille sat quietly in her mommy's lap, mesmerized perhaps at what she was seeing. Then, after about a quarter and half, she started to get somewhat restless. So Reg watched the rest of the game from the side of bleachers near the exit door. Camille played in the general vicinity as the older kids watched over her. Good news: Daniel's team won the championship!

Here's a couple shots from the game! The second shot captures Daniel's only made shot of the game. Nice form, little man!

BTW, Lauren also got a trophy because her All-Star basketball team won a couple of tournaments while we were gone. We were soooo happy for her when we learned about her team's success when we were in the PI. We were just really, really sad that we missed the games. At least we were able to see her trophy presentation. That's her on the bottom row, far right.
We also went to get a haircut for all three boys. They needed haircuts even before our trip, but I was simply too busy to give them haircuts or to take them to a barber. So when we got back from the PI, my three sons all looked like Mowgli from the "Jungle Book". Camille also got her bangs cut. Cute na cute talaga!

We also stopped by Reg's parents' house for lunch. Camille let her grandpa carry her for the first time. Reg's dad is one of those old guys that kids seem to adore. I'm sure he and Camille will be best buds in no time.

While we were out and about, whenever Camille would get restless ... in the car, at the gym or at the barber ... we'd pull one of the oldest parenting tricks in the book. Bubbles! We've learned over the last ten years that all kids LOVE bubbles. Little kids love popping bubbles and slightly older kids love blowing bubbles. Assuming you're not at Church or anywhere serious like that, blowing bubbles is one of the best distraction tricks of all time. In fact, we often carry little bubble bottles with us just in case. It worked today for Camille, because when she got cranky in the car ... we had Lauren blow bubbles and viola! The crankiness stopped, and the giggling and laughter from Camille and Kyle began.

All day long, Camille continued to have a blast exploring the house. She spent a lot of time in the backyard, going up and down the slide structure with Lauren and Daniel. Lauren has been an absolute angel, watching over Camille every step of the way. One time, I watched Camille just walk around the entire inside of the house as I followed her from about ten feet away. She didn't know I was behind her, and I observed her walk all around ... looking into each room ... running around the kitchen table ... going in and out of the toyroom .... all with a huge smile on her face. I wonder what she was thinking.

During dinner, Camille was literally falling asleep in her high chair. She'd rub her rice-filled hands in her hair and fight to keep her eyes open. So, before she fell asleep, we gave her a bath and put her to bed. Again, we simply gave her a bottle, lied her in the crib and told her to go to sleep. We walked out of the room, and she put herself to sleep.After that, Reg and I talked about how blessed we really are because this transition has been about as smooth as possible. I know it's super early, but so far there have been no meltdowns, no constipation/diarrhea commonly associated with newly adoption children, no illnesses, no complicated adaptation issues at all. Just the typical child rearing issues you'd expect from having an 18th month old. Today, she didn't hit, whine or throw a toy. I don't know if it's her personality or the way the orphanage raised her ... or a combination of both ... but she is such an easy going kid, we feel a bit spoiled. Needless to say, we also feel truly, truly blessed.

BTW, we still haven't adjusted to the time change. We were so sleepy today, we just had to take a mid day nap. In fact, it's now 2:50 a.m., and we've been awake for over and hour and half. Camille is also still on Philippine time. She woke up at 1 in the morning, so we sat her in our bed and layed out about ten books for her. She'd pick up a book, open it up, and babble out loud pretending to read. She had a blast doing this, giggling up a storm. I'm just glad the other kids didn't wake up from all the giggling and singing she was doing.

Oh well ... I should try to sleep. Good night.

First Day Home

2009-04-04T03:55:00.000-07:00

Today was Camille's first full day at home with her forever family. Reg and I were still very jet lagged and we had a very hard time keeping our eyes open for most of the day. Camille is still on Philippine time as well, as she slept from about 5 a.m. to 1 p.m. When all the kids were back from school, they bombarded Camille trying to get her attention (particularly 8 year old Lauren, 5 year old Daniel and Camille's 10 year old cousin, Rochelle). At times, she was a bit overwhelmed by the attention, but after everyone calmed down a bit, all was well. In fact, it was absolutely fantastic because as Reg and I unpacked, tidied up, and tried our best to re-energize, Camille was totally pre-occupied with exploring her new home with her new siblings. The only downer was that I wasn't able to capture all those precious moments on camera or video. Here are a couple of shots I was able to take. As you can see, Camille was constantly surrounded by the others (especially big sister Lauren) who watch over her like a fragile doll.

Check out this big smile:

Here, Daniel is putting tiny Lego men into his new toy Filipino tricycle.

Camille's hitting has almost completely stopped, but she still whines when she doesn't like something, such as a food or a toy. She also threw some toys (which is a total no-no at our house), but I suppose that's just her being a 18 month old. As for the whining ... well, she's learning the hard way that it simply will not get her anywhere in this house. At the kitchen table, Lauren tried to give Camille her sippy cup. Rather than just shake her head, Camille whined and whined. Mommy Reg told Camille "no whining!" and put her hand up, as if to say "stop". Camille's reaction was to cry, so I told the other kids not to soothe her. After about four or five minutes, she realized that her crying was getting her nowhere so she just stopped. Just like that. We went through that similar routine about two or three times today. I'm sure that in time, she'll adjust. She just needs to learn how to communicate her feelings in a non-whiny way. (Yikes! This is beginning to sound like an article from one of the ziliions of parenting magazines to which Reg has subscribed over the last ten years).

Before dinner, Camille was visited by her Auntie Sarah who came to pick up some gifts from the PI. And since Auntie Sarah is a regular blog reader, I just had to include her picture with Camille. Awww! How cute.

And here is the very first of a bazillion pictures featuring the three ladies of the house: Reg, Lauren and Camille.

As you can see from the next picture, Reg had a field day in the PI buying Filipino snacks for dirt cheap. I think she plans on opening her own sari-sari store (super tiny, "variety" stores throughout the streets of the PI).

And here's a picture of the calendar we made for the kids while we were gone. Each day, they'd check off a day, giving them a visual image of our return date. Every few days, whenever the kids seemed to really miss us, my parents would give them pre-wrapped gifts which we bought for them before we left.

Good night, Camille!

WE'RE HOME!!!

2009-04-03T03:42:00.000-07:00

On Thursday, April 2 right before 10 p.m., Camille finally met her brothers and sister. When we got to the house, my parents were there with all four kids. Many of Reg's family was there as well, ready to give us a big welcome home. It was funny because I walked in first, video camera in hand. My five year old, Daniel, walked right by me, did a double-take, and said, "Oh. Hi, Dad." He casually walked to me and gave me a hug. He's given me much, much bigger welcomes after coming home from work.

Anyway, the homecoming was very, very much a blur. I was frantically trying to take pictures, take video, reconnect with my kids whom I haven't seen for two weeks, catch up with my family, etc. In the end, I could tell you this:

Camille fit right in. All four kids surrounded her, trying to get her attention, showing her their toys. She was a wee bit overwhelmed because of all the attention, but she reacted not by shying away or throwing a fit. She would just move on to the next person or toy to play with. She totally loves our toy room. She seemed to enjoy sitting in the toddler sized chairs, playing with everything from the Littlest Pet Shop dolls to the play-food to the blocks. She was also a bit mesmerized at the kids' toy room computer. Isn't it a treat to see the look of wonder on a child's face?

Here's Lauren with the baby sister she's been waiting for her whole life:Here are Daniel and Lauren fighting for Camille's attention:
As for the relatives, all was great. I was tickled when Camille immediately let my mom carry her. She even sat in my mom's lap a couple of times. When that happened, my mom had a grin from diamond encrusted-gold earring to diamond-encrusted gold earring.

After about half an hour of mingling/bonding/catching up, Reg sat on Lauren's bedroom floor surrounded by all five kids. When I walked in, Reg said to me, "Look, I have all FIVE of my kids!" Then she gave them all a big, group hug. Sayang (too bad) I didn't have my camera or video camera with me. That was a pretty precious moment. If I were the emotional type, I probably would have cried. But I'm a manly man, so I didn't.

The rest of the night was spent trying to catch up with the other kids, while simultaneously making sure Camille was okay. It was a school night, so we put the kids to bed at little after 11. As I've done almost every night since she was born, I sang "Butterfly Kisses" to Lauren after all the kids said their prayers. For some weird reason, Daniel started crying after he said his prayers. When I asked him why he was crying, he couldn't explain himself, and he ended up sniffling himself to sleep. Overwhelmed with happiness? Or is he sad that the Dad the Disciplinarian is back? Hmmmm.....

It's now 4:20 in the morning, and Reg, Camille and I have been awake for over two hours. We're all still on Philippine time. Reg has been unpacking while I've been blogging and uploading pictures (2300 pics or so in two weeks. Don't you just love digital photography?). Camille is walking around the living room and kitchen exploring everything in sight. Aside from all our boxes and luggages, the house is immaculate, thanks to my mom, the house sitter.

Camille really seems quite at home here. Maybe it's the Filipino love songs she hears playing on the kitchen Ipod player ... or the walis (Filipino broom) she sees in the corner ... or the rice cooker she sees atop the counter. Whatever it is, she seems to fit right in. And that, my friends, makes me one happy daddy.

The Flight Home

2009-04-03T02:46:00.000-07:00

I'm sitting here on the airplane as Camille sleeps next to me. The airport experience was a "good news/bad news" sort of situation. The "bad news" was that at EVERY SINGLE checkpoint, my mother-in-law was stopped and interrogated. Her overly-stuffed boxes and bags were all opened, and she had to surrender some canned goods (which she could have bought anyway at any Filipino or Asian market five minutes away from her house here in the States). After a bit of a hassle, she got through ... but not without a little bit of stress ... and grease money.
The "good news" was that while my mother-in-law was having her boxes opened and inspected, Reg spotted a couple of famous Filipino movie stars -- Richard Gutierrez and his mom, Anabelle Rama. Reg was playing it pretty cool on the outside, but I could tell that inside, she was as giddy as a teenie bopper at Jonas Brothers' concert. Too bad for Reg's mom though. She gets totally giddy and star struck at the sight of a famous Filipino actor/actress. But as she was trying to grease the baggage guy, Reg asked Richard for his picture:

For Reg, that picture with Richard was the perfect ending to a fantastic and unforgettable trip.

In the airport and during the half hour or so before we took off, Camille was a bundle of energy. I may be wrong, but I think she sensed something special was taking place. I also think that she was totally overstimulated by all the hustle and bustle. As a result, Reg was kind of pooped out even before the plane took off. Camille wasn't crying or anything. She was just restless, and, of course, she would only let Reg carry her. Poor Reg. She fell asleep five seconds after Camille did. So, now I'm sitting here while the two of them are fast asleep. I hope Camille sleeps throughout the flight!

OK, I'm back. The flight is nearing the end. Camille slept for about 9 of the 13 hours. During the four hours she was awake, she was understandably restless -- wanting to walk, wanting to sing, wanting to grab anything and everything in sight. It was tiring for Reg because the Cameleon didn't want to be carried by anyone other than her mother. Reg was a trooper, and in retrospect, Camille was fine. We were waiting for a total meltdown, but that never happened.

In flight movies: "Bedtime Tales", "Quantum of Solace", "Marley & Me" (Dude, Jennifer Anniston is babe-a-licious).

Here are pictures of Camille on her flight to America!!!

And one last thing ... just like on our flight going to the PI, all requests to join the mile high club were soundly rejected by Reg. Arrrgghh!

After we landed, we spent about an hour in various lines, including immigration. When the immigration officer handed us Camille's approved paperwork, he congratulated us and explained how to get her social security card, green card, etc. Unfortunately, things were happening so quickly, I don't remember anything he said. I guess I'll just google it.

After getting through all the lines, we were greeted by about 8 of Reg's family members who were so excited to see Camille. Camille didn't seem too fazed about all the attention, and she sat quietly in her baby Bjorn as we trudged our way out the airport.

Finally, we drove home, and for the first time in her life ... Camille sat in a car seat!!!! We expected her to resist being harnessed down, but she only mildly protested. For most of the 40 minute drive, she sat quiet, looking out the window. Here's a picture of the monumental event:
Welcome to America, Camille!

Donation Pleas ... Please

2009-04-02T02:35:00.000-07:00

As I sit here almost ready to leave for the airport, I'd like to say a prayer for the many children here in the PI waiting to be adopted. I would also like to make a plea to all of you reading this blog to donate some of your used maternity clothes and children's items, etc. to Camille's orphanage and to the birthing home where she was born. The two entities are wonderfully run by American Christian missionaries Deborah and Darren Gustafson, along with Deborah's sister and mother. Deborah's parents founded the birthing home almost twenty years ago, and the orphanage was a natural off shoot of the birthing home. They deliver anywhere from 30 to 70 babies a month to mothers who cannot afford to go to a hospital.

Many of you reading this can look around your house and find drawers full of extra clothes and bins full of toys and books that haven't been touched for months. If that's the case, the Little Children's Home could definitely use your help. Also, our house has enough toys to fill a pre-school. So rather than giving us toys on special occasions, why not wrap something for the orphanage or birthing home? We intend on shipping stuff to them a couple times a year, so if you give us your donations, we'll ship it for you. And, of course, they gladly accept money donations as well.

Here is the Gustafson's blog: http://gustafson-family.blogspot.com/. Check it out and God Bless you all. Please pray for our safe flight back to the States.

Let the Fanaticism Begin

2009-04-01T19:37:00.001-07:00

Go Bears!!!!

Food from the PI

2009-04-01T14:19:00.000-07:00

While we were here, we pigged out big time. Here are some of our delicious dishes:

Better start working out again!

The Filipino Adoption Process

2009-03-31T19:04:00.000-07:00

Boring Alert! Boring Alert! This post is aimed at Americans contemplating adopting from the PI or who are in the process of adopting from the PI.

Now that we're just about at the end of our international adoption journey, we thought it'd be interesting to describe our thoughts about the process of adopting from the Philippines from the United States. I don't have my files in front of me, so I'm not sure if all of this is totally correct, but it should be close to accurate.

In a nutshell, Americans who plan on adopting from the Philippines should expect a really loooonnngggg wait. We started filling out our application over two and half years ago. The home study and application process is very paper intensive. The PI requires medical checkups from the parents and all the children in the home, letters from the children's teachers, income verification, three letters of referral, a letter from the Church, criminal background checks, a letter from a psycho-therapist explaining that we're mentally healthy, autobiographical essays, a lengthy home-study report, etc. You are also asked to fill out a long checklist to indicate if you are willing or unwilling to accept certain characteristics in your adopted child. For example, you are asked if you are willing to accept a child who was the product of rape or incest, whether you are willing to accept a child with a serious medical condition, whether you are willing to accept a sibling group, etc. There are certain factors that could speed up your process and there are certain factors that could delay your process. For example, if you are willing to accept an older child, a sibling group, or a child with medical problems, the wait will be shorter. We, however, only wanted a healthy girl (or 2) between the ages of 0-36 months. When we turned in our dossier, our agency told us to expect an 18-24 month wait just for a match. Surprisingly, we got matched with Camille after just 16 months. I think the fact that we are both full-blooded Filipino helped, but I'm just speculating.

One factor that significantly delayed our process was the change in the Hague rules. Almost a year ago, the international rules of adoption were changed (I suppose to protect against fraud, child trafficking, etc., and to ensure uniformity among participating countries). Our agency advised us not to fill out our application to the Department of Homeland Security (the I-600A Petition) until after our referral because the new Hague rules might change everything. In retrospect, we should have filed our I-600A application much earlier since the "old" forms were still being processed even after the rule changes. The new form, entitled, I-800A, takes long to process (approximately 3 months, if there are no problems). After that is approved, you have to submit an I-800 application, which is much faster to process, but can't be submitted until after you received certain legal documents about your soon-to-be adopted child. It seems silly to me that this process is broken up into two parts: I-800A and I-800. In my opinion, both applications should be submitted simultaneously and reviewed just once.

Processing of the I-800 is fast (a few days or weeks). At this point, however, every day seems like a months since you really, really want to pick up your child. After the I-800 is approved, it gets forwarded to the National Visa Center, which is basically a middle man to the U.S. Embassy in Manila. Once the file is with the U.S. Embassy, you're almost at the end. However, this is where the process gets really really really frustrating. It's frustrating because there really is no timeline or deadline on which to rely. The U.S. Embassy will send something called a "packet 3" to ICAB, which gives ICAB the authority to schedule the child's medical exam and visa interview. The time it takes for the US Embassy to send that packet 3 is any one's guess. We've read that it could takes days or weeks. In our case, it took about a month -- a long, frustrating month. The reason it's so frustrating is because you have no idea if the file is being worked on or if it's sitting on the bottom of some government worker's desk collecting dust. Totally in the dark. At least with the I-800A application, you can call and speak with the person assigned to your case to find out the status of the petition. Getting through to ICAB is also a bit difficult, so we were often left guessing whether or not our file was being processed by ICAB or whether it was sitting in the wrong "to do" box.

Assuming there are no problems with the medical exam or the visa interview, the U.S. Embassy will issue the child's visa and then give ICAB permission to authorize travel. That can take a few days, but seriously, at this point, you want to pull your hair out because you want to travel so badly. I think ICAB should make a much better effort of communicating with the adopting parents about the status of the application/file. I don't think ICAB appreciates how difficult it is to simply "drop everything" and travel to the other side of the world. Our travel plans affected not only us, but also my work, our kids, my parents (who were going to halt their lives to babysit during our trip), my sister-in-law (whose kids are babysat by my mother-in-law who accompanied us on our trip), etc, etc, etc. On top of all that, we needed to purchase tickets and book hotel rooms on the spur of the moment. I don't think ICAB appreciates all that goes into the travel plans, and more open communication would tremendously help to reduce the stress of adopting parents.

Of course, now that we have Camille in our arms, the frustrations seem to fade. However, we truly pray for all you loving families who are awaiting an approval, a referral, or simply "the call" authorizing travel to the PI.

On a positive note, however, I believe adopting from the PI is much cheaper than adopting from other countries. From what I understand, it costs upwards of $30-$40 grand to adopt from some other Asian countries. Perhaps because our adoption agency is a non-profit agency, we paid much less than that (maybe half, not including travel).

Soooooo .... if you're thinking of adopting from this beautiful country, just remember that it's a very long process. The rules are in place, so there isn't too much guesswork. It's just long. But in the end, you'll have a child. And isn't that what it's all about?
Here, Camile says, "But Daddy, look at my cute face. Wasn't I worth the wait?" Answer: YES!!!

More ICAB Photos

2009-03-31T18:56:00.000-07:00

In case you care, here are some more pics of ICAB. BTW, it was interesting signing the guestbook at ICAB and seeing some names that we recognized from the adoption blogs.

I really love this last one:

ICAB Meeting

2009-03-31T03:41:00.000-07:00

Today, we went to ICAB for our exit meeting. (ICAB is the Inter-Country Adoption Board -- the Filipino governmental agency that oversees all international adoptions). It's located in a small office building in a residential area. The person assigned to our case was Kathy de la Cruz. She was a very nice, young lady. She gave us Camille's her passport and Visa papers, Camille can officially travel with us back to the U.S. Here is her passport photo. How cute!

We were also given gifts to help us teach Camille about her Filipino heritage. Very thoughtful gifts, indeed.

We were also blessed by seeing Deborah at ICAB. She was there to find a family for one of the children from her baby home. She also gave us a wonderful album/scrapbook with nice notes written by Camille's caretakers.

During our stay there, Ms. de la Cruz showed us around and explained why there are what seem to be unnecessary delays in the process. She seemed equally frustrated that adoptions to U.S. families take so long. It seems to me that if the U.S. weren't so strict on its end, then ICAB would be more willing to send children to the U.S. But if ICAB has the option of dealing with, say, Norway or Finland, which have much less restrictive adoption procedures, then it will be more inclined to take the faster and less complicated path by sending the child/children to the non-U.S. country.

I found the experience to be quite positive. For the past two years, communicating with ICAB has been difficult, if not impossible. So it was nice to see ICAB "face-t0-face", and to be able to express our opinions about the entire process.

Camille Update: Camille is adapting well. She still prefers her mommy most of the time, and she didn't whine or hit as much today. She is very curious about everything she sees, and she also quite a really good climber. Oh, she's finally eating more than just rice now.

Catching Up (Part 1)

2009-03-30T02:41:00.000-07:00

As I sit here relaxing by the pool on the rooftop of our hotel, I realize that I'm four or five days behind on the blog ... and there's no way I could possibly catch up. So, let me summarize what we've done since Thursday. But first, here's a Camille update:

Camille is adjusting fine. She is amazingly good on car rides, especially given the bumpiness of each ride, the length of some of our car trips, and the unbearable heat when we are not in an air-conditioned car. Another thing: she is a GREAT sleeper. By that, I don't mean that she sleeps a lot. I mean that she's super easy to put to sleep, she sleeps through the night, and she doesn't make a sound when she wakes up. I don't know exactly how they treated the children in the baby home, but I could tell you this: to put Camille to sleep, we simply need to give her a bottle, lie her down, and tell her to go to sleep. She'll lay there totally quiet and drink her milk until she falls asleep. Then after a perfectly peaceful sleep, she'll wake up and JUST LIE THERE ... waiting for someone to come and get her. She doesn't whimper or whine or even climb off the bed to come looking for us. She just lays there looking around. Amazing. Finally, she's really good at responding to the word, "no". If she's doing something she's not supposed to do, such as trying to turn off the TV while we're watching, we say "no!". Then .... she just stops what she was doing and moves on. That's it. Weird, huh?

Don't get me wrong ... we still have some issues to deal with. For one, she is a total mama's girl. When Reg is around, she almost exclusively insists on being held ... or fed ... or transported ... by her mama. That could be annoying (for Reg at least), and Reg is definitely tired at the end of a long day. But then again, Reg reminded me that all of our kids were like that at Camille's age ... so I guess she'll eventually take a liking to me. :) I also mentioned in a previous post that she has a tendency to whine. She doesn't have words yet, so she just whines whenever she wants or doesn't want something. That's got to change. And finally, we discovered that if someone tries to do something Camille doesn't like, she hits. Yikes! One of the top rules in our household is "No hitting!", so this has definitely got to change. She's cried a bunch of times when we've firmly told her not to hit, but it's a habit that still needs some time to break. Today was better, though. In fact, she tried to hit me only once, but even then, she sort of stopped herself right before she made contact. I think she remembered how sternly I reacted the last time she hit me.

Ahhh ... parenting. Don't you just love it?

Images of the Philippines

2009-03-29T17:39:00.000-07:00

Chicken-head-on-a-stick, anyone? How about chicken-feet-on-a-stick?

If that doesn't sound tasty, just go to McDonald's for breakfast and order a Hamdesal meal!

This is an outdoor, wood-burning stove top. Pretty freakin' cool, if you ask me!

Chicharon Espesyal! Mmmmm....

Here's a mall employee sweeping with a walis (Filipino-style broom found in EVERY Filipino home). At closing time, all the employees were bent over sweeping with a walis.

Who knew the word "mall" was a verb?

Pumping water from the ground. Yes, ground water pumps still exist!

The obesity epidemic has definitely missed the PI. I'm not sure if it's because of the heat, but I'd say that for every overweight person, there are 20-25 people who are normal weight or underweight (in the city, at least). Here's an advertisement for WEIGHT GAIN medicine. You won't see that in the U.S.!

The U.S. has Cinnabon. The PI has Binbingka-bon!

Filipino style tsinelas (slippers)!

This sign politely asks people not to pee here.

The Filipino flag flying above -- a sight not seen in the U.S.

Why We Adopted

2009-03-28T12:20:00.000-07:00

I'm sure many, many people have wondered why on Earth Reg and I would want to adopt. After all, we already have four, healthy children. Our house is quite modest. We are living on a single income, and judging by the size of my kids, I can assure you, there won't be any basketball scholarships coming our way. When people ask us why we've decided to adopt, we usually say something light, such as (1) "Why not?" (That's a creative); (2) "Since we look like Brad and Angelina, we might as well act like Brad and Angelina" (That's my favorite); (3) "We've got to catch up to Octomom so we, too, can make millions!"; or (4) "We need one more to make a basketball team."

In all seriousness, there are many, many reasons why we've chosen to adopt. Below are just a few reasons that come to mind, but they are absolutely in no particular order of importance:

1. We Love Kids: Reg won't admit this, but it's obvious to me that she's quite a natural when it comes to dealing with kids. Some people are good at computers Others are good at networking. Reg is really good with kids. That's why she majored in Child Development, became a preschool teacher, and plans to return to the Child Development field when all our kids are grown up. While I've always loved being around kids (my family says I've never really grown up), I've truly grown to love everything about parenthood. Sure there are tough times -- such as when the autistic boy was "playfully" attacking Kyle at the playground, or when Jason sledded face first into a giant log, or when a 7 year old boy asked my 6 year old Lauren for her phone number and SHE GAVE IT TO HIM (yikes!) -- but in the end, there's nothing better than tickling the kids in bed on a lazy Saturday morning, or watching their creativity flourish as they perform a play in dress-up costumes, or listening to them squeal as they play "let's tackle dad for the 20th time today." Parenthood is not for everyone ... but for us, it's everything.
2. We Really Want Lauren To Have a Sister: As Reg can attest, there is something special about having a close sisterly bond. Reg's sister lives less than 10 minutes away from us. She and Reg talk all the time. They regularly watch (and house) each other's kids. They are Godmothers to each other's kids. And they were each other's Maid/Matron of Honor. No doubt influenced by Reg's close bond with her sister, we really wanted Lauren to have a sister as well.
3. Gabriella's Death; In 2002, Reg gave birth to a full term baby girl who shockingly died approximately 24 hours after her birth. I think it's safe to say that if Gabriella lived, we would never have adopted a baby girl. But that doesn't necessarily mean that we never would have adopted. After all, if Gabriella lived, then Daniel and Kyle wouldn't be here, and we could very well have gone on to have one or two more baby girls. If that were the case, we might have adopted a baby boy to ensure that Jason could have a brother. Who knows? All that I know is this: Although we wish Gabriella had survived, I simply can't imagine my life without Daniel and Kyle. And if it weren't for Gabriella's passing, we would never have had this opportunity to be Camille's parents. Our Lord and our Savior works in mysterious ways, and we don't question for a moment the path He has chosen for us.
4. Four C-Sections Is Enough! We've been told by several doctors that C-sections get riskier and risker after two or three. (The risk is that the mom's stomach can burst open like Aliens because it's been cut open so many times). Reg has had four C-sections (Lauren, Gabriella, Daniel and Kyle). After Kyle was born happy and healthy, we simply didn't want to press our luck and get Reg pregnant again.
5. We Feel that We Have Something to Offer: Although we are not rich by any stretch of the imagination, our house is overflowing with love, fun and happiness. Why not share that with someone less fortunate? Which leads me to ...
6. Helping the Less Fortunate: I know this sounds super corny, but we really do want to help the less fortunate. However, rather than handing the homeless guy in the parking lot a dollar or feeding a group of poor, hungry people on Thanksgiving, how wonderful would it be to completely alter the life of a child who could otherwise end up on the street living a life of poverty? We recognize that adopting Camille is not going to end Filipino poverty, but that shouldn't stop us, right?
7. Helping the Philippines: The amount and extent of poverty in the Philippines is almost unimaginable to those of us living in the States. During our two visits to the PI, we have seen many, many children living on the filthy streets of Manila. We can't adopt them all, but we can remove one of those kids from a life of extreme poverty. It's the least we can do for the country we still refer to as "home". (FYI for all you non-Filipinos: No matter how long a Filipino has lived abroad, he/she still refers to a trip to the PI as "going home to the Philippines"). Moreover, with regard to the poverty here, it is personally quite moving. Yes, I've seen images of the poor on the National Geographic channel. Yes, I've bought chicklets from the beggar children in Tijuana. Yes, I've seen "Slumdog Millionaire." And, yes, I've personally interacted with hundreds of homeless people as a part of my job. But I am a parent now, and I am a proud Filipino. And there is just something about seeing my own peeps in these horrid living conditions that just tugs at this guy's Filipino heart.
8. We've Always Wanted a Big Family: I'm one of 4 and Reg is one of 5. For as long as we've been married, we've always said that we wanted 4 or 5 kids. It's like we predicted the future!
9. Leading by Example: Since we announced our decision to adopt, many, many couples have confided in us their desires to adopt. Maybe, just maybe, our actions will convince those couples to "take the leap."

Again, these are just some of the reasons why we've chosen to adopt. There are others, but these are the main reasons. I frankly can't recall which one of us first brought up the idea of adopting. I do recall, however, that about four years ago, a co-worker of mine was in the process of adopting. She showed me a flier she got at an adoption workshop. The flier was advertising Filipino Adoptions and it advertised a ridiculously low price of well under $10,000 (BTW, that price turned out too good to be true). Knowing that other types of international adoptions can cost upwards of $30,000, I thought the flier was worth showing to Reg. After she saw it, we both agreed to look into it. At the time, Reg was pregnant with Kyle, and we knew that she was going to give birth to another boy. So, I did my research, and about a month after Kyle was born, I requested an application from my adoption agency. The rest, as you can plainly see, is history ...

Boring Alert! Boring Alert!

2009-03-27T14:17:00.000-07:00

Aside from our meeting with ICAB on Monday, we'll be spending the rest of the trip visiting relatives here in the PI. I'll start each blog with an update about Camille and her adaptation process, then I'll go on to describe the rest of our day. So for those of you who are reading this blog for insight into the Philippine adoption process, most my future blogs may bore you to death. But if you're related to us, or if you're the type of person that watches reality TV ... knock yourselves out.

Wednesday: Taxis, Street Vendors and Camille

2009-03-27T14:00:00.000-07:00

Today we took a trip to Baclaran, where there is a huge church and tons of street vendors. Reg, Camille and I took a taxi there. Reg was warned by her local relative to make sure that we don't seem like tourists so we don't get ripped off. In other words, "Tell Mark to shut the (bleep) up, and you do all the talking." No problem.

We got in the cab and I thought I'd instantly given away our cover by instinctively trying to put on the never-ever-used seatbelt. Oh no! When I realized my mistake, I slowwwwly put the seatbelt away, hoping the taxi driver didn't notice. When the driver said he was going to take a shortcut to avoid traffic, we became immediately suspicious. But he must have thought we were locals because (1) the fare was half of what we were told to expect from the hotel staff; and (2) he dropped us off a block away from our destination, telling us to cut through a dirty, off-the-beaten-path road filled with heart-breakingly poor people and the run down, tiny shacks which they call home.
When we got to the church, we needed to track down Reg's mom who had spent the night in her hometown of Pajo. After an hour of playing a real life version of Where's Waldo (see other post), we finally found her. The weather was brutal. We've been eating like baboys (pigs) since we got here, but since we sweat so much, we haven't gain any weight (at least according to the scale we borrowed to measure the weight of our luggage).

Had it not been for the brutal weather and Camille's (understandable) crankiness, Reg would have spent a fortune from the rows upon rows of street vendors. She ended up buying some super cheap pajamas, tank tops and short for the kids. Her mom, on the other hand, acted like Julia Roberts from Pretty Woman, shopping and haggling to her heart's delight.

After shopping, we took another cab home. The ride was pretty brutal. The A/C wasn't working, and the traffic was, well, typical Manila traffic.

We got back to the hotel and immediately went to the rooftop pool. Within minutes, it started to drizzle and it was quite fun swimming in the rain. I'm not sure how many times Camille has swam before, but she was having the greatest time of her life. She'll fit right in back in the States because our other kids also love to swim.
Camille Update: Camille has become quite the mama's girl. She'll volunteer to be carried by me or by her grandma or by her aunts, but today she almost exclusively wanted to be carried by her mama. The only problem this presents is that it gets in the way of Regina's shopping. (Oh no!) Other than that, it's been a smoooooooth transititon. Thank you, God.

Where's Waldo - Live in the Philippines

2009-03-25T16:25:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, I described how crossing the streets in the PI was like playing Frogger in real life. Well, today, I had to find my mother-in-law in a crowd of hundreds and hundreds of Filipinos. It was like playing Where's Waldo in real life, but with constantly moving images. We went to Baclaran, where there is a huge church and rows and rows of street vendors selling everything from fruits to underwear to giant crucifixes to knock-off Raybans. Reg and I took a taxi there (more on that later), with the plan to meet Reg's mom in front of the church. No problem, we thought.

Wrong. First of all, when we got there, it was hotter than a summer day in the Sahara Desert. Second, there was a billion people there. Third, we had no cell phone number to call to find her. Fourth, Camille was totally restless. So here we were trying to find a grandma-aged Filipino woman, about 5'1", medium build and short dark hair. Hmmmm. That describes just about every single grandma-aged woman in the Philippines, so finding her wasn't easy. Ang hirap naman!

Don't worry though. We found eachother ... after about an hour of playing real-life Where's Waldo. Miserable ... but at the end of the day, we got some good deals shopping. :)

Reg and Piolo

2009-03-24T17:19:00.000-07:00

Reg loooooovvvvvvvves this Filipino actor -- Piolo Pascual. She's been stalking him since we got here.

Day Five: Movin' on the City

2009-03-24T11:52:00.000-07:00

Today was not very eventful. We lazily hung out at the hotel because the person who was going to pick us up was going to be three or four hours late. So we just ate, napped, walked around the lush hotel grounds, put our feet in the pool, and packed all our stuff. The hotel's internet server was down, so I couldn't email, blog, Skype, Facebook, nothing!

The nice slow pace of the morning was actually nice because previous couple days had been pretty hectic. It's nice to recharge every once in a while. It also lent itself to some quality bonding time with Camille.

Right after lunch, Regina's godfather and his driver showed up to pick us up. As we left the town, we all said goodbye to the only place that Camille has called home. She has no idea just how different her life will be away from this place. I hope we can be back in less than five years so that all my kids, including Camille, can see where she was born.

We ended at our hotel in Quezon City. Whereas our first hotel was surrounding by lush trees and nature, this one was in the middle of a concrete jungle. It's surrounded by buildings, large an small. There lots of cars, people and SMOG! Yuck. The hotel room is nice. Not five star. Not even four star. But it was cheap and we had to accommodate 5 adults and a child. So that's why we chose it.

Reg, Camille and I were dropped off at the hotel, while Reg's mother and her aunts went off to visit relatives. They'll spend the night in a different city, so Reg, Camille and I will get to explore Quezon City alone.

We crossed the street to go the mall. If you haven't been to the PI, crossing the street is like a life-like version of Frogger. People just cross the street whereever and whenever they feel like it. Crossing lanes? Don't be silly. Here, the pedestrians, the cars, motorcyles, and the jeepneys all interact like a dance. The pedestrians actually understand that cars are bigger than people, so they let the cars go by before scurrying across the lane. But the window to cross is brief and crossing between two speeding vehicles is the norm. It really is like Frogger in real life.

Before we crossed, I checked all directions. Reg, who was carrying Camille, was right behind me. When the coast was clear, I signaled to her to follow me, and I took off -- the human Frogger. I got across no problemo. It reminded me of Berkeley. But when I turned around, Reg was still on the other side of the street with a big smile on her face. She hadn't crossed a Filipino street since our last visit to the PI fifteen years ago, and this was first time crossing the street with a baby in had. So understandably, she was a little gun shy. But with a smile on her face, she crossed no problem. Yes, she's still a TRUE FILIPINA! (BTW, the secret to crossing the street is just to follow the guy next to you. They all know what they're doing).

The mall was really cool. We wanted to explore all afternoon long. Other than getting money and finding an internet cafe, we were free to roam. We ate some of the snacks from the food carts (empenada at Yumpenada ... waffle sticks filled with cheese ... fruit shakes). Unfortunately, we couldn't stay at the mall long because Camille was having a mini-meltdown. She was really sleepy, and couldn't really sit still in our arms. So we left the mall after about an hour. We crossed the street like pros.

We spent the rest of the night relaxing at the hotel. It was really quite relaxing, except for the hum of traffic below (we're on the 11th floor). We ordered in food service and put Camille to bed at about 7. Reg watched some TV, I read a book, and ... just like in the States, I fell asleep after less than 10 pages of reading. I guess things don't change when you go to the other side of the world.

Camille Update: Camille's adapting fine, but there are obviously going to be hiccups here and there. She's definitely comfortable with us. I think being able to speak to her in Tagalog makes a big difference. And she was given pictures of us months and months ago. I'm sure that helped as well. Again, given some of the adaptation horror stories we've read, we feel really blessed.

The problem is that her schedule is totally off. At the baby home, she was on a very, very rigid schedule. Wake up at this time. Eat at that time. Then vitamin time, play time, nap time, then lunch time, etc. Because we're out and about all the time, her schedule is totally out of whack. Poor Camille.

Interestingly though, she is totally testing us with some old-fashioned whining. If she doesn't get something she wants, she'll open her mouth wide and pretend cry. (She's actually kind of adorable when she does it). The problem with Camille's whining game (from Camille's point of view, at least) is that Reg and I have played the whining game about 467 million times in the last ten years. We know every counter-whining move in the book. In fact, WE could write the book on how to deal with whiners. After four kids and two dozen of nephews and neices, we're professionals at the whining game, for goodness sake!

So far, it plays out like this: Camille will want something. We say no. She'll whine as described above. We'll explain to her why she can't get what she wants. She'll whine some more, then we'll repeat what we told her and not give in. After a few minutes, she realizes that her whining isn't working, so she'll reach to mommy for a hug, and guess what ... the whining stops. It's as predictable as the sun rising in the West and setting in the East. Huh? Yes, it's going to unpredictable. She'll probably throw a full on tantrum today or tomorrow. We'll see. That's what parenting is all about, right? So far, everything's working out (although we are DREADING the 15 hour plane ride home). Lesson learned: the whining game is played the same whereever you go, whatever baby talk language you speak.

She's also became quite attached to one of Reg's Aunt (Tita Imelda). Maybe we can take Tita Imelda home? Hmmmm ....

No Internet? ARRRGGGHHHH!!!!

2009-03-24T11:49:00.000-07:00

For the last 48 hours, I haven't been able to access the internet. At our first hotel, the server was down. Frustrating, but not a big problem since I knew we'd be moving on to the next hotel the next day. Then we get to the second hotel, and I learned that the server was down there too. Now, I'm really frustrated. No email, no Facebook, no Skyping, no sports updates, no blogging. I felt totally naked.

Fortunately, I was briefly able to sneak away into a little internet cafe. It was located in the mall across the street from our second hotel. There were several internet cafes, and I stupidly chose the cheapest one. The reason it was the cheapest one was because their computers sucked and their internet access was super slow. So, I simply checked our email for important messages and briefly scanned Facebook because, well, we love Facebook.

I couldn't play around on the internet long because Camille was giving Regina a really hard time while they waited. Camille was really sleepy, so she was getting cranky and restless. I ended up spending just thirty minutes at the computer, but most of that time was spent waiting because the freakin' internet was so slow. Total charge: 10 pesos, which is less than a quarter.

Day Four: Shopping and the Despedida (Part 2)

2009-03-24T11:47:00.000-07:00

The Despedida (going away party): After the mall, we rested a bit at the hotel and then made our way to the baby home (a.k.a., orphanage) for Camille's despedida . We had given Deborah and Darren some money and told them to throw a big bash. And boy did they succeed. There were at least thirty people there, and there was more than enough food for everyone: spaghetti and chicken from Jollibee, lots of pizzas, platters and platters of fruits and mangos. They also had lots of deserts and some brewed coffee (which was a refreshing change from the instant coffee they typically drink). Notice how there was no authentic Filipino food?

But best of all, we had our very own (drumroll, please) ........ mamang sorbetero (Ice Cream Man)! He brought his cart right into the patio area and served ube, cheese and mango flavored ice cream. It was a blast, and both the kids and adults thoroughly enjoy the ice cream on this hot, humid day. I got particularly happy when I saw the mamang sorbetero passing out free ice cream to all the neighborhood kids who were peeking through the gates in envy.Before we ate, Reg passed out little bags of gifts to each of the women who work at the baby home. It wasn't much, but they seemed pleasantly surprised to get individualized gifts. After Deborah said grace, everyone had an opportunity to say something about Camille.

I went first, and I had so much to say. I wanted to say how grateful we are and how blessed we feel to have Camille in our lives. I wanted to tell them that even though people tell us that Camille is the luckiest kid in the world, we truly are the lucky ones. Not lucky actually, but blessed. I wanted to individually thank each of the special people at the baby home -- Deborah, Darren, Joy, and all the care workers who have basically mothered Camille all these months. I wanted to remind them that TLC is a special place and that by working with these abandoned and surrendered children for the very little money they get paid, they are truly doing God's special work. I wanted to tell them that they are all angels on earth. I wanted to promise them all that we'd take great care of Camille, that she'd be raised in a loving home and that she one day, she'll graduate from college (Berkeley seems like a good fit). I wanted to tell them that although we've dreamed of this week for two years, it's turned out to be even better than we'd ever imagined. Finally, I wanted to assure them that we'd do our best to keep in touch over the years.

I wanted to say all this, but frankly, all I could get out more than three to four unintelligent sentences before I started to choke up. This was odd because I never get choked up ... ever! In fact, I've literally only cried about two (maaaaybe three times) in my entire adulthood. Funerals -- no tears. Sad, weepy movies -- dry eyes. Depressing news stories about terrorist attacks and hurricanes -- nada. Tears of joy -- what are those? Reg thinks something is wrong with me. I say, I'm a manly man. But today, there was no manly man in me because after just a few seconds of speaking, I got choked up and really couldn't continue. No tears, just choked up. (Maybe I should see a doctor).

After my ultra-abbreviated speech, Reg spoke (in Tagalog, of course). Here is a woman who cries watching the Ellen DeGeneres Show, yet she wasn't teary eyed one bit! She made me look like a big, fat wussy. It was the same on our wedding day -- which was one of the other few times that I actually cried. Reg walked down the aisle with a big (and beautiful) smile on her face, while I sobbed like like an Irishman who had just lost his beer money. It seems that on the biggest stages, my wife likes to make me look like a big softie.

Reg says she's not a public speaker, but she did a wonderful job thanking everyone. She made sure to point out that this must be a very special occasion, since I was actually "crying". (First of all, Reg, I wasn't crying; I was choked up. And secondly, did you really have to highlight my wussiness for all to see?). Reg assured everyone that even though Camille was moving to the States, she would be surrounded Filipinos in a very Filipino household, with lots of siblings, cousins and even Filipino TV (just kidding, she didn't say the part about TFC).

After Reg spoke, each of the caregivers said something as well. Many were teary-eyed, and one or two were flat out bawling. They all said basically the same thing -- that they will really miss Camille because of her wonderful personality and her love for singing. (One said that she'll look for Camille on "American Idol" one day). They said that they were happy for us and that we seemed like a good family. Another woman from the birthing home next door told us that she was present during Camille's birth and that she was both sad and happy to see her go.

After the speeches, everyone pigged out. Everyone seemed really, really happy. It was worth every penny. A big, genuine smile was plastered on my sweaty, wussy face.

During the entire party, Camille was being held by the various women from the baby home. When she was given to Reg before we left, Camille totally freaked out. People tried to comfort us, but we were totally fine. We understood and expected Camille to have some detachment issues. That's natural. When Camille wouldn't stop crying at the top of her lungs for ten minutes, Reg suggested that we take her out for a walk. Sure enough, she stopped less than 20 yards from the baby home. (Maternal instinct at work, I suppose).

We also received a "Life Book", which is basically a detailed scrapbook of the first 18 months of Camille's life. It was lovingly made by Camille's social worker, Joy, a college educated young lady who assists Deborah and Darren with the administrative part of the baby home. From what we've been told and from what we've seen, Joy and Camille seem to have a very special bond. Reg has made scrapbooks for each of our other kids, and now Camille has one too. It's so very beautiful. Joy clearly put a lot of work into making it. Thanks, Joy! Here's a picture of Reg reading the Life Book back at the hotel:
After the despedida, we had a quiet dinner at the Deborah's mother's home. Deborah's sister was there too. She is a big part in the adoption placement process because she is member of the small committee that reviews adoption applications and matches children with parents. She told me that she specifically recalled reading our file and choosing us as Camille's forever family.

When dinner ended, we said our goodbyes. I finally got a picture who Darren, who is quite skilled at avoiding cameras. C'mon, Darren, you live in the PI ... ham it up!

We went back to the hotel and relaxed. Another long day. Tomorrow, we leave Taytay and head off the the urban jungle.

Day Four: Shopping and the Despedida (Part 1)

2009-03-24T11:46:00.000-07:00

Today was divided into two parts: Shopping and Camille's "Going Away" party at the baby home.

Shopping: Since we had a free morning, we decided to venture off the local mall. We started off at Starbucks because I wanted to compare it to Starbucks in the States. The coffee tastes exactly the same, but it's a little bit cheaper. The biggest difference was the intimidating, armed security guard who'd open and close the door for every guest.

Most of the time was spent in one department/grocery store. I noticed that there were about five times too many employees there. I literally saw about 4-5 employees for every customer. These employees kept the store in the utmost perfect condition: spotless floors and not one misplaced or crooked product. That's evidence of just how cheap labor is in this country.

Reg loved the grocery store. It had tons of local fruits already, peeled, cut up and ready to devour. They sold different types dried fish in self-serve basins, like they do with nuts or hard candies back in the States. (My kids would have taken the whole tuyo bin home with them). The ice cream and bola-bola displays in the frozen food area looked so good, we just had to take some pictures ... until we were told that picture taking was forbidden. What the ...?
Then we ate an early lunch. Mmmmmm ... good. Two plates of delicious, fried dumplings (drenched in a tasty, but fatty sauce) with rice and a coconut drink for just over two bucks. It was so affordable that Reg splurged and got a fruity dessert: a variety of fruit on top of crushed ice and coconut, served in her very own coconut! Delicious and barely over a buck itself. If they sold these in the States at this price, Reg would buy one everyday of the week and twice on Sundays. I could tell Reg liked it by the smile on her face as she devoured every last drop ... literally. She looked like a starving person on a deserted island who had just cracked open his first coconut.
One wonderful thing happened this morning: Camille finally allowed Reg's mom and aunts to carry her. Somehow, something just clicked, and now Camille has five adults here to lug her around. It's neat to see whole adaptation process unfolding before our eyes.

Shopping in the PI

2009-03-22T22:03:00.000-07:00

Just got back from shopping at the mall. It turns out that shopping on this side of the Earth is EXAAAACCCTTLLLYYYY the same as back at home: I stand around for an hour while the women shop.

While driving home, I saw a motorcycle carrying a couple. They had a young child in between them and another child in front of the daddy driver. That four people on one motorcyle. And, of course, no one was wearing a helmet.

Filipinos! Don't you just love us?

The Human Carseat

2009-03-22T14:05:00.000-07:00

Here is a picture of a Filipino carseat. Get it? There is none! I don't even know if there is a word in Tagalog for carseat.Camille's carseat is very pretty, don't you think?

Wanna Adopt?

2009-03-22T13:13:00.000-07:00

These kids all need a family ...

Actually, adopting parents can't "pre-select" children, but there are thousands more like these throughout the Philippines.

Day Three: Meeting Camille's "Foster Family"

2009-03-22T04:48:00.000-07:00

Day Three began really really early in the morning. I suppose my body hasn't adjusted to the time yet because I've been waking up during the middle of the night, unable to fall back asleep. Last night was no different, so I ended up uploading photos and blogging until the wee hours of the morning. Camille woke up before the sun came up, so I took her outside to see the stars. We walked around the beautiful hotel grounds and gazed at the night sky. I carried her for our entire twenty minute midnight adventure. It was a nice, quiet bonding moment.

BTW, Camille refused to fall asleep in her crib last night. That's interesting since it was brought here to give her a sense of normalcy. Ever the optimist, Regina interpreted this as Camille's way of saying that she wants to stay with us. After all, theorized Reg-the-philosopher, the crib represents her life as a family-less child. Camille doesn't want that anymore. (Way to see the glass as half full, babe! That's pretty deep.)

Anyway, when the sun rose, we joined Reg's mom and aunts and took pictures around the hotel grounds (we're so Filipino like that). We had breakfast at the hotel and then relaxed until Darren picked us up at 10:30.

When Darren picked us up, we were off to see Camille's "foster family". At "The Little Children's Home", Deborah and Darren allow their staff to take time off during the Easter and Christmas holidays. When this happens, each young child spends the holidays with a volunteer family. These family's are referred to as "foster families". Camille spent her first two Christmases and her first Easter with an absolutely wonderful foster family who happen to attend Deborah and Darren's church. Camille's foster family includes Rebecca, Mark and their three young kids.

Their home is approximately an hour away from our hotel, so I was able to chat it up with Darren in the car. I picked his brain about a bunch of different topics, such as the inflated prices Filipinos charge white people in the PI, how he enjoys driving in crazy trafic, and the pros and cons of riding a motorcycle in Filipino traffic. Interesting guy, Darren is. He looks like Jesus Christ, was raised in the woods, never had a TV until he was 12 or 13, reads books ALL THE TIME, teaches philosophy at a Filipino seminary, and helps run a birthing home and orphanage in a third world country. All on a missionary's salary. Amazing.

One unforgettable sight we saw on the way was a couple on a motorcycle. The guy was driving the motorcycle, the mother was in the back, and child (age 4?) was standing up on the chair wedged between them, being held by the mom. The parents were wearing helmets but the child was not. And get this, the boy (I assume) was carrying an umbrella to shield them from the sun. I desperately wanted to take a picture, but given Filipino traffic, they were out of sight in a flash.

When we arrived at Rebecca and Mark's home, our jaws dropped. Mark and Rebecca are American citizens living in the Philippines. Mark apparently has a very good position for an American company, so I believe he gets a salary comparable to a well paid American in America. Because the dollar stretches to far in the Philippines, Camille's foster family is living large-and-in-charge. Cha-ching! Their enormous house (I'm guessing 5,000 square feet, plus a pool) is in a gated community filled with politicians, other well off "ex pats", lots of old school Filipino money, and (that's right you TFC lovers), Filipino movie starts -- can you say, Lea, Pops and Aga? Comparing their house and gated community to the poor areas we've seen is like comparing Malibu Beach to downtown Pakistan on a really hot day. Luxury.

I'm not exactly sure how the foster family selection process works, but it's really downright erie how similar Regina and Rebecca are. They names both begin with the letters "RE" and end in the letter "A". They both have rich husbands named Mark (rich in love, at least). They both met their husbands in junior high. They both have lots of kids. They both have a bunny, turtles and fish. Rebecca has a beagle, Reg wants a beagle. They both tried to get a hermit crab, but the crab didn't survive. They both have big toyrooms in their homes. They bought the same high chair. They have very similar parenting philosophies. They both love taking pictures of their family. Rebecca has three yayas (maids), and Regina wishes she had three yayas. And most importantly, they both love Camille! Yes, Rebecca clearly has a special place in her heart for Camille. Unlike us, Rebecca knew Camille before Camille crawled, during Camille's crawling stage, and during Camille's wobbly walking stage.

We stayed at Rebecca's house for the entire afternoon. Together with Deborah and Darren, we discussed about a wide range of topics, including the adoption process in different countries, the movement to totally ban home births in America (ridiculous), unsuccessful adoption matches, illegal adoptions, and so much more. (I even learned a little about speed reading, since Deborah comes from a family of super bionic readers). After over twenty years in the birthing/adoption business, Deborah and Darren can fill a book with their experiences. Maybe I'll suggest that to them.

Camille seemed quite at home in Rebecca's house, and after a while, she was comfortably sitting in Rebecca's arms. Rebecca gave us a CD containing pictures of Camille's experiences with Rebecca's family. (You know how much we love pictures!). She cried when we left, but before we did, we assured both Rebecca and Mark that we would tell Camille all about them when she's old enough to understand.After leaving Rebecca's house, we got back into traffic and went to the hotel. On the long ride to the hotel, I spoke with Darren about everything from the salaries of laundry women (around 7 bucks a day, give or take a few bucks) to the image of lawyers in the PI (very good for civil attorneys).

When we got to hotel, Regina was so exhausted, she crashed almost immediately. Camille and I, meanwhile, were wide awake. So, I played with Camille until she tired out. She would stick her tongue out and making a farting sound, then I'd fall down as if she shot me with her saliva fart. She laughed hysterically each of the 300 times we did that.

Eventually, Camille fell asleep next to her mommy. Interestingly, she still doesn't want to be put to sleep in her crib. We're fine with that since our kids all slept with us when they were little. In fact, Daniel and Kyle still crawl into our bed in middle of night at least 3 times a week.

Camille will still only let Regina and I carry her. Reg's mom has tried every trick in the book to get Camille into her arms, but Camille refuses. She plays with her grandma, but for now, she only wants to be carried by her forever mommy and forever daddy. I keep telling her to get used to grandma because that's baby sitter number 1 back in the States! I know the bond will happen soon, and when it does, I'll be sure to take a picture for you all.

Adaption-wise, Camille has been great. We've read many stories of adoptive parents who've had very dificult times bonding with their new child, so we feel very very blessed. Camille seems completely comfortable with us. I think that is a credit to how she was raised at the orphanage. From what I gather, the children there are raised with adoption in mind. In other words, Deborah and Darren do everything they can to get these children into families. As Darren so eloquently put it, "every day that a child is with us is a failure" because that means that they (Deborah and Darren) haven't placed the child with a family yet. This mentality explains why Deborah and Darren never refer to "The Little Children's Home" (TLC) as an "orphanage." To them, an orphanage is an institutionalized place where kids grow up until they're 18. TLC is simply referred to as a "baby home" since the children are only there for a brief moment until they are adopted.

Till tomorrow ...

Here She Is!

2009-03-22T04:15:00.000-07:00

Here are the pictures of the beautiful baby you've all been reading about:

Video Games? TV? What are those?

2009-03-21T11:44:00.000-07:00

In the two days we've been here, we've seen and observed lots and lots of kids -- in the streets, in the orphanage, at the home of our orphanage director. One thing is very noticeable: even though they don't have video games or television, the kids in this poorer areas have just as much as the kids back in the States. As I type this, Jason is probably back home playing the Wii, Lauren is watching Disney Channel, Daniel is on the DS, and Kyle is sitting at the computer table perusing www.cartoonnetwork.com. I'm not saying that one form of play is better than others, but it is a stark reminder of how simple life can be. Back home, TV, computers and video games are such an integral part of everyone's lives. But when it comes down to it, kids are kids, and they'll have fun just using their imaginations ... playing, playing, playing.

I also noticed that in this area (which is nothing like the urban jungle known as Manila), the kids just wander the streets playing with one another. The parents feel safe because the neighbors are all part of this "community", this "village" if you will. Even in the super-duper poor area we visited, kids were everywhere in the streets. And parents seemed fine with it.

I suppose this is what "middle-America" was like decades ago, but I can assure you, it's not like that now in the big city where we live. Where we live, kids play at home, usually indoors. When they go outside, they do so under the close supervision of a relative. It's sad, really, that Reg and I don't even feel comfortable letting our kids walk alone to the park, which is literally just a couple minutes away from our front door.

Oh well ... just an observation.

Day Two: Gotcha Day (Part Three)

2009-03-21T11:06:00.000-07:00

After visiting the birthing home where Camille was born, we headed back to the hotel. Darren brought and assembled Camille's crib in our room. This is done so that Camille could more easily adjust to the new surroundings. When Darren left, the moment had arrived: we were actually alone with Camille! By this point, Camille was totally comfortable with us and we spent the next 1 1/2 to 2 hours bonding with her. We played, we danced. She had a blast grabbed scribbling away with a pen on my notepad. She'll fit right in at home because Kyle and Daniel absolutely LOVE to draw and color. I could see the three of them already, sitting at our dinner table with paper, crayons and pencils everywhere.

We walked around the hotel grounds and hung out by the pool. Beautiful weather. Just a tad humid, but nothing like we'd anticipated.

After a while, we started getting hungry, so we all decided to go out for dinner. But first, Reg wanted to buy some tsinelas (slippers) for Camille. She's got big feet! So get this ...

We all hopped onto two "tricyles" which took us to the Antipolo church. If you haven't been to the PI, let me explain what a tricycle is. It's not the thing you rode on when you were four. It's either a motorcyle or a bicycle with a buggy attached on the side. In our case, it was a motorcyle. Two people can fit in the buggy, and there's a seating space for another one or two outside the buggy. Reg and I crammed into the buggy with Camile on Reg lap. No seatbelts. No carseats. If we were in the United States, we'd be investigated by Children's Services for taking Camille on this ride. Here is a picture of a typical tricyle:
It took less than ten minutes to get to our destination. The traffic was wild and crazy, and our tricycle driver was was going in orchestrating between moving cars and jeepneys like a symphony. Fun times, indeed. Camille sat there enjoying the breeze in her face.

Have you noticed that Camille still hadn't cried the entire day! She'll pout and squeal if she doesn't want something, but she literally has not cried yet.

When we got to the area near the church, there were street vendors and little shopping stores lined up everywhere you turned. It was a lot like downtown LA, minus the crackheads. Reg and I were LOVING it. We don't travel much, but when we do, we like to do the non-touristy stuff much more than the touristy stuff. Sure, we make an effort to see all the stuff tourists are supposed to see, but we also strive to go where the locals go, eat what the locals eat. When we went to Hawaii, we intentionally went out of our way to eat at the local dives rather than the popular one filled with tourists and honeymooners.

The shopping was fun. Lots of super cheap stuff -- clothes, fruit, illegal DVDs with all the latest movies. We visited the Church where we said some very heartfelt prayers, thanking God for giving us our wonderful daughter. We bought some imitation crocs for a little over a dollar. We also got some cheap pajamas for kids. Sucky quality but ridiculously cheap.

We ate a food stand serving typical Filipino food. We had sotanghon, arroz caldo, rice and calderetta. Yummy!! Then Reg's mom when on a mini-shopping spree at this one tiny vendor who sold candies, peanuts, etc. She LOVES haggling, and she's quite good at it. She was having such a good time with the vendor, that it became somewhat of a spectacle. After a while, Reg's mom was surrounded by people trying to sell her rosaries, sampaguita, etc. She was having a BLAST. She probably felt like a millionaire. I had a great time just observing because I could tell that she was really getting a kick out of being there, haggling away.
By this time, the sun was setting, so was took our tricycle rides back to the hotel. We nearly crashed about five times, but our driver expertly avoided each one. Reg gave Camille a bath (tabo-tabo style) in the bathtub. She's a lot chubbier than my other kids. She still has that bloated, toddler tummy. So adorable.

After her bath, I put her sleep. Or should I say, she put me to sleep. She didn't want to lie in her crib, so she laid down with me on the bed. I tried to soothe her to sleep, but (as usual -- this happens ALL THE TIME) I fell asleep first. I was awoken in the middle of the night by Reg carrying the sleeping baby to her crib.

Our first day as Camille's parents was over. Pure happiness fills my heart as I type this blog.

Some observations: Camille is really bright. She knew how to pretend read with book, and she was able to figure out how to manipulate all the new toys and gadgets in front of her. She has excellent fine motor skills -- she can open zippers, unlatch and latch tiny latches, etc. She eats A LOT. With our other kids, it's a struggle getting them to eat ("Kyle, take three more bites or you can't play outside!"). We're definitely not going to have that problem with Camille. Also, she doesn't cry a lot. I know it's waaaaaayyyyy to early to come to this conclusion, but given the whirlwind day she just had, I'd expect her to cry at least once. But nope. She hasn't cried yet. I'm amazed.

That's our first day with Camille. Hope you enjoyed reading it!

Day Two: Gotcha Day (Part Two)

2009-03-21T10:32:00.000-07:00

After Skyping with my family, we all made our way back to the orphanage. Len Len gave Camille a bath (tabo-tabo style, of course) while Reg sat beside her. Meanwhile, I was bombarded by all the other kids who, once again, tried everything they could do to get me to play with them. I tried my best to play with the children, each of whom desperately wanted my attention. I know these kids are all very very well taken care of at this wonderful orphanage, but I couldn't help but think how sad it is that these kids aren't yet adopted. They are all soooo adorable, and there are so many fantastic, loving families out there. I pray that God allows their adoption process to go quickly because they are all so precious and deserving of a family. The really cool part was that because these kids speak primarily Tagalog, I was able to use the little Tagalog I know. Reg was amazed because I never really speak Tagalog even though I understand some. But with these kids, I had no choice. They were only communicating in Tagalog, so I had to bust out and finally use my words. I must say, that one year of Tagalog in college did me some good. After all, I was able to communicate with these kids with very little problem. I guess you could say, that when it comes to speaking, I have the Tagalog fluency of a three year old. Galing ko naman!

After Camille's bath, Reg and I were allowed to put her to sleep in her crib. It was just the two of in a room with three cribs. The other cribs had two other ADORABLE 1 year old girls. Camille fell asleep first, but the other two wouldn't sleep. Reg carried one baby and I carried the other. She told that she wanted to take home all three kids. I think she was only half joking. We talked about the other families on the adoption blogs that we read, and we imagined how happy they would be if they had either of these absolutely adorable kids.

While she slept, we checked out the infant room where all the babies stay. It was room Camille slept in for the first year of her life. It was small with about 5 or 6 cribs. It was clean, and there were, I believe, three babies sleeping there. We signed some documents allowing us to take Camille home. Then, it was back to the playroom where I was, once again, bombarded by the kids. Fun, fun, fun.

After a few minutes, Reg's mom and aunts (who had spent the morning visiting the nearby Antipolo Church) arrived. Reg's mom tried her best to get Camille to warm up to her, but it wasn't happening. Camille reacted by going to me and allowing me to pick her up. From that point on, something clicked and Camille was totally comfortable with me. She still hadn't allowed Reg to carry her, but was definitely comfortable with me. (It must be the big strong comforting muscles in my arms).

The kids then had lunch, and Camille let me feed her. I think she'll fit right into our house because she was fed thus far, my kids love to eat -- tinola, saging, sabaw and rice.

After the kids' lunch, we all walked back to Deborah and Darren's house where we had a roasted chicken lunch inside the bahay kubo. Camille sat in my lap as Reg fed her. It was just like old times with all our other kids.

After lunch, we all walked over the birthing home next to the orphanage. We met the midwife that delivered Camille, and we saw the actual room where Camille was born. According to the midwife, Camille's birthmom was only in labor for twenty or twenty five minutes, and there were no complications whatsoever. We were given Camille's medical history and took lots of pictures. Again, fantastic experience. The couple that runs the birthing home have put together such a wonderful operation. The place was clean, well organized, and fully staffed with happy, qualified midwives.

Day Two: Gotcha Day (Part One)

2009-03-21T09:35:00.000-07:00

In the world of adoption, the term "Gotcha Day" refers to the day the adopting family finally gets to meet and take home their adopted child. Yesterday, March 21, 2009, was our Gotcha Day, and let me tell you, it was one of the most memorable, amazing days of our lives. I am really at a loss of words to describe the day because "amazing", "wonderful", "joyous", etc. just don't cut it. Let me tell you how it all happened ...

We left out hotel at about 5:15 a.m. with the hopes of getting to the orphage before Camille woke up at 5:30. I suppose she woke up a little early because when we arrived at the orphanage about ten minutes later, she was already awake. Darren led us to her room where still-groggy Camille was being held by one of her caregivers, Len Len. Before this joyous day, we've read many, many stories about how it take a while for the adopted child to bond with the adoptive parents. However, whenever I imagined this moment, I always just assumed that Camille would see us, wobbled over to us with outstretched arms, shouting "Mommy! Daddy!" Well, that didn't happen. Camille had just woken up, and she just looked us with a "I-wonder-why-these people-are-in-my-room-so-early-in-the-morning" kind of look. Oh well. Regina gave Camille a toy doll, which Camille seemed to like. The doll came with a fluffy backpack, which turned out to be a big hit amongst the other kids.

We then proceeded to the main play room where we were greeted by about 5 or 6 other kids, all waiting to be adopted. For over an hour, Camille seemed very much content sitting with Len Len, while Reg and I interacted with the other kids. Well, "interacted" isn't quite the word because once we got the play area, I was bombarded by four of the kids. Senon, an engergetic three year old boy, instantly reached up to me asking for me to carry him. Bernadatte, an adorable 1 year old girl also wanted me to carry her at all times. Meanwhile, these handsome 3 (almost 4) year old twins, Dennis and Jay, were doing everything they could to play with me. They loved my camera and camcorder, and I had to pry the electronics away from them many, many times. It was very obvious to me that these four kids in particular desperate want a father because they seriously would not stop playing/attacking/grabbing me from the second I walked in to the moment I left. If Bernadette had it her way, I could have carried her all day long. And the three boys (Dennis, Jay and Senon) wanted me to play with the so badly. At one point, I was carrying three of them while the fourth was tugging my shorts waiting for his/her turn to be carried. Meanwhile, Regina was playing with Camille and two absolutely adorable 1 year old girls, Diane and Jekey (sp?). Again, Camille didn't really interact with us. She'd high five me every once in a while, and I could see her sort of interacting with Reg. But for the most part, she was content sitting in Len Len's lap, adjusting to the morning. She played with the paperback photo album we sent her many months ago. It's full of pictures of our entire family, and from the looks of it, it's probably been looked at about a million times. It's now ripped, wrinkled, tattered and torn. That was actually nice to see because the idea behind the photo album is to introduce the baby to his/her adoptive family before his/her Gotcha Day arrives. The fact that this album was nearly torn to pieces means that Camille's been looking at our pictures as much as we've been looking at the referral picture (which is in frame on our wall just above our computer monitor). Then, the kids all ate breakfast. Len Len fed Camille as Reg sat beside her. We then all played outside on the small yard outside. Camille let me hold her hand as she wandered around, and she definitely seemed to be liking me. I was so happy.

At about 7:45 or so, we walked over the home of Deborah and Darren, the couple that run the orphanage. Camille still hadn't taken to us at this point. We sat in the backyard bahay kubo (Filipino hut) and had pancakes, fruit and some much needed coffee. Then, IT HAPPENED. At about 8:15, the connection finally happened. At first, she let Reg feed her. Then, she put her hand on Reg's lap as Reg fed her. Then she actually sat on Reg's lap. Finally, she let Regina pick her up and she rested her head on Reg's shoulder. After twenty years of being together, Reg and I can pretty much tell what one another is thinking, and I could see by the look on Reg's face that she was one happy and relieved mommy. Deborah and Darren (who've been through this routine many, many times) allowed us to play inside with Camille while they enjoyed the rest of their breakfast in their bahay kubo.

For the next twenty minutes or so, Camille played with Reg and I. It was the breakthough we had waiting for. It's good we have experience playing with babies because I pulled out all the silly games I could think of. It was a fun, quiet twenty minutes. After that we actually Skyped with our kids back home! The kids, along with my parents, were able to see Camille, who still wouldn't let Reg or I carry her. I still blows my mind that we were able to video chat with our kids from the opposite side of the earth.

Discussing Adoption (Part 1)

2009-03-20T10:38:00.000-07:00

Just a Thought: When speaking to adoptive parents, don't ask about the child's "real" or "natural" parents. The adoptive parents are the child's real parents, and it may be offensive to suggest that they are unnatural in any way. Instead, refer to the child's biological parents as his or her "birthparents" or "biological parents".

Day One: Amazing

2009-03-20T04:53:00.000-07:00

Today was a day we will never ever forget. After unpacking our stuff, we had lunch with Reg's mom and two aunts at a local restaurant. The five of us stuffed ourselves all for about $18, which included a super-duper generous tip. We then headed to the mall to buy some essentials for our two week stay. The mall here near the orphanage is very nice -- clean, crowded, not dramatically different from malls in the U.S. Then Reg and I headed off with Deb and Darren to tour the area around the orphanage. The poverty we saw was similar to "Slumdog Millionaire" minus the mountains of trash. We saw homes that were literally the size of walk in closets, made of nothing more than thin pieces of wood and metal nailed together. I was told that large families live in those shacks, which didn't even have running water. Seeing the poor kids on the streets nearly broke our hearts. They were playing just on the edge of the road where jeepneys and motorcyle riders sped by. The kids spilled onto the streets seemingly oblivious to the danger. Filthy kids stared at us while we took in the sights. Some begged for money, but most just stared. Seeing that kind of poverty was heart wrenching. We wanted to take some or all of the dozens of kids we saw home with us because, according to Darren, there is realistically zero chance of any of those kids to even become middle class one day. In other words, they were destined to be filthy and poor their entire lives. Some probably wouldn't even live to see adulthood. Their clothes were filthy and tattered, and I didn't see a single toy anywhere other than a ball. If you feel like donating old clothes, toys, shoes ... anything, I urge you to ship it Deb and Darren who will distribute it to these needy families.

After taking in the "sights", we had dinner at the house of Deborah's mom, Jeri. Nearly twenty years ago, Jeri and her late husband founded the birthing home and orphanage where Camille was born and raised. In addition to hosting us, Jeri was also hosting a bunch of students from the class she teaches at a local seminary school. We spent the night talking at length about how the children from the orphanage are matched with adoptive couples. It was a fascinating discussion, and I really grew to appreciate how much effort and prayer goes into each matching decision. These decisions literally change lives, and Deb and Darren (and those with whom they work) take that responsibility very, very seriously. These missionaries truly do have hearts of gold.

Tomorrow will be another long day. We'll be picked up at 5:00 a.m. so that we can be at the orphanage before Camille wakes up. Gotta rest. Sorry I couldn't post any pictures, but I can barely keep my eyes open as I type this. Good night.

We're Here!

2009-03-19T19:34:00.000-07:00

We're sitting in our hotel room in Las Brisas, which is minutes away from the orphanage. On our way here from the airport, we drove very close by the orphanage, and it was very weird to think that our DAUGHTHER was just minutes away from us - oblivious to the fact that our "gotcha day" (that's adoption lingo) is tomorrow!

The airport was surprisingly organized. The weather is not nearly as bad as I anticipated. We were greeted at the airport by Reg's relatives, and also by Darren (who, along with his wife, Debbie, run the orphanage). Darren drove us through the crazy traffic to our hotel in Rizal. We love our hotel because it's totally NOT westernized. We specifically didn't want a hotel like the ones in Makati where we'd feel like we never left the US. This is a tiny little hotel with good sized room, lush surroundings and most importantly, wi-fi. And the kicker is that this room costs only $40 a night!!

We just finished Skyping with the kids back home. Isn't it amazing to think that we're were talking to them face to face in real time from the other side of the world. Hopefully, they won't miss us as much if we Skype with them daily.

Well, right now, we're going to unpack, freshen up, eat lunch at some local dive, then meet up with Darren for an afternoon of hanging out -- Filipino style!!!!

Airbound!

2009-03-19T18:56:00.000-07:00

Mark here. It's now 11:30 on Thursday night (US Time), and I'm sitting in an airplane on the way the PI. I'll be typing my thoughts onto a word processing program, then posting once I get to a wi-fi spot or internet cafe.

The plane took off about an hour and ten minutes after the scheduled departure time (which I suppose, is "on time" in Filipino Time). I was amazed at how quickly and easily we got through the screening process. It was fast and efficient. Not at all what I expected post 9/11.

Anyway ... I'm trying not to fall asleep because I want to adjust to Philippine Time. As we sat in the airport and again on the plane waiting to take off, Regina and I kept telling each other how surreal this all felt. We've been imagining this moment for so long that it almost seems like a dream that we are actually sitting on a plane to get Camille.

Leaving the kids behind was difficult. As expected, Reg, Lauren and my mom all got teary eyed. We called home right before we boarded the plane. Reg spoke to all the kids, and Daniel was already crying to her, telling her how much he missed us. It's going a be a looooonnnnggg two weeks for the kids, since they've never ever been away from the two of us for more than 24 hours straight. And because Reg is a stay at home mom, the kids are basically attached to her hip. So, needless to say, this will be a difficult challenge for Reg as well.

Well ... I better go. The flight attendants are getting ready to serve us our first meal! Our choices are Chicken Teriyaki or Pork Bikol Express. I think I'll have the Pork. Mmmm.

OK, I'm back. I think I'm going to gain fifteen pounds on this trip because I ate my entire airplane meal AND half of Regina's. I see a trend starting.

Anyway, we've been on the plan for about nine hours ... so in seven hours or so, we should land be in Manila. This flight is a lot longer than our usual flings to Vegas or San Fran. The movies they've showed so far are Madagascar, The Day the Earth Stood Still, that Deniro-Pacino flick which got horrible reviews, and a sitcom wth Christina Applegate. What ever happened to the classics, like "There's Something About Mary", "My Cousin Vinny" or "Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle"?

OK, they movie chooser just redeemed himself. They are now showing "Changeling", the most under-appreciated movie of 2008.

We just landed! We're safe. We'll post more when we get settled.

Exhausted, But Ready to Travel

2009-03-18T01:00:00.000-07:00

It's me, Mark ... It's now less than 24 hours until our plane takes off, and we're already pretty exhausted. Friday was a blur ... telling everyone about our impending trip and frantically trying to pack. Saturday, we hosted a party for Jason's 10th birthday. We had about a dozen 10 year olds trashing our house -- they were literally playing full contact football in our toyroom! On Sunday, my parents arrived from out of town. They will be living at our house for the next three weeks. We had other relatives over as well, so we were still in full-on host/hostess mode. On Monday, while I frantically tried to finish the piles of paperwork on my desk at work, Regina showed my parents everything they'll need to know while we're gone -- where to drop the kids off at school, where and when basketball practice is, how to use the laundry machine, etc. We also had some unexpected guests over Monday night who had lovingly stopped by to bid us farewell. Tuesday was Jason's birthday, so after work, we took him shopping at the mall and then had birthday cake after dinner. All this time, we've been trying to pack. I think prior to getting the official call on Friday, we were reluctant to pack for fear of jinxing the whole adoption. Bad move. We should have packed already, because now we're frantically trying to pull it all together at the last second. On top of all that, it's been five days since my last run, and I feel fat. Oh well, in about 21 hours, I'll be chillin' on an airplane, ready to get to my homeland to meet Camille. After waiting for over 2 years, I still can't believe this day has finally arrived. Thanks everyone for all the wonderful well-wishes, prayers and presents!

Happy Birthday to Reg!!!!

2009-03-14T08:36:00.000-07:00

37 Years Young!!!!!

Jason: "I love you, mommy. You are the best mom ever. I wish you could live with us forever. You're the best mom we could ever have. Happy Birthday!"

Lauren: "Oh my gosh! You're so pretty. I can't believe you're 37. You look like you're 18."

Daniel: "I love you. You're the best mom in the whole universe."

Kyle: "Happy Birthday, Mommy. You're my present."

Mark: "Happy Birthday, babe. For your birthday, I'll take you to the Philippines."

With the body of a 21 year old sorority girl (who's had five kids), Reg celebrates her 37th birthday today. She'll celebrate with a dozen or so 9-10 year old boys who will undoubtedly trash our house while celebrating Jason's 10th birthday. This is the life of a mom. Actually, we celebrated last night by having a wonderful, meatless dinner at Red Lobster. As a present to their mom, the kids were well behaved and ate all their food! Then they devoured Reg's birthday cake as if they'd never seen chocolate in their lives. At the end, Daniel had a chocolate goatee, Jason and Lauren were fighting for the last crumbs, and Kyle was fat and happy as can be.

Too bad Camille couldn't be with us ... but she'll be in our arms in less than a week. BTW, Thursday was Camille's 18th month birthday.

It's Official: We're Off to the Philippines!

2009-03-13T00:06:00.000-07:00

It's midnight now, and we just got off the phone with ICAB. The ICAB representative handling our case officially gave us permission to travel to the Philippines to pick up our baby! As you can imagine, we are giddy with excitement. We're leaving on Wednesday, March 18th. We'll spend just over two weeks in the PI and be home in time for our kids' spring break. It's such a relief because our lives have basically been on hold for weeks (if not months). Thanks to everyone who has supported us during this entire experience. God has answered our prayers! And now ... we frantically pack.

More Good News, But Uncertainty Remains

2009-03-11T20:28:00.000-07:00

We called the US Embassy today and found out that Camille's Visa has officially been issued. Therefore, as far as the US government is concerned, Camille is "ready to travel". (She's has her visa and her passport!) So now, we are literally waiting the final step in this loooooooonngggg two year process. We simply need ICAB to email our adoption agency granting us permission to travel. How long that takes is anyone's guess. We've been in contact with many people who've adopted from the PI -- some got the "go ahead" just a couple days after the Visa Interview, some a week later, some even longer. So, in other words, it's a quite unpredictable when we'll get "the call." In fact, it's even more uncertain today because the laws of international adoption have recently changed. Our application is one of the first that have been processed under the new laws, so past adoption timelines aren't completely reliable references. Anyway, our frustrations mount because we simply don't know if we can travel on the 18th, as we'd like. So, it's been a good news, bad news sort of day. We're told that in the end, when Camille is in our arms, all this frustration will all be forgotten. [Sigh]

Visa Interview Complete

2009-03-10T20:54:00.000-07:00

Wonderful news! Camille's Visa Interview was today, and from what we understand, everything went well. As some of you know, the Visa Interview is essentially the last step before ICAB (the Filipino government agency in charge all international adoptions) grants us permission to leave. From what we understand, once the Visa Interview is complete, we're pretty much good to go!!! Thank God. All we're waiting for now is for ICAB to email our adoption agency here in the states advising us that we can travel. When that happens, we have twenty work days to pick up Camille.

Of course, we've got our hearts set on travelling on March 18th. If we leave on that date, we can spend two weeks in the Philippines and be back in time for Daniel's 6th bday in early April. Soooo ... please pray that we get good news in the next day or so.

Happy Birthday, Camille!

2008-09-11T19:53:00.000-07:00

Crawling on Grass (Part II)

2008-09-04T18:40:00.000-07:00

Our Camille

2008-09-04T17:29:00.000-07:00

Here is Camille sitting on grass for the first time

Camille's Forever Family

2008-07-23T19:35:00.000-07:00

Kuya Jason, age 9.

Ate Lauren, age 8.

Kuya Daniel, age 5.

Kuya Kyle, age 3.

LOVE at first sight!!!

2008-07-22T19:30:00.000-07:00

This is Camille's referral picture that was included in her packet. Mark had surprised me because he had picked up the packet earlier in the day and didn't tell me that we got our referral. He came home with some flowers and her picture was in a little frame. He started video taping me and I had no clue what he was up too. To my surprise he finally shows me her picture and tells me "This is your little girl". WOW!!! That was my first thoughts and feelings. I couldn't believe she was real. We waited 16 months for a match made from HEAVEN. Well worth the wait!!!

Hello! Let us introduce ourselves.

2008-07-21T20:29:00.000-07:00

Welcome to our very first blog. With this blog, we will try to keep everyone updated on our adoption journey. We've never blogged before, so forgive us in advance as we learn as go. We'll try to post photos and videos as much as possible, but like we said ... we're totally new to this.

Anyway, as you already know, we are Mark and Regina. We have four biological children, Jason (age 9), Lauren (8), Daniel (5) and Kyle (2). We are currently in the final phases of adopting Camille, an eleven month old girl from the Philippines. She has lived in an orphanage all her life, and hopefully, in the next few months, she'll be in our arms for good. This is not only a major event in our lives, but it's also a major event in our family histories, since no one from either of our families has ever adopted.

As you can imagine, we are brimming with emotions right about now. So join us as we travel on this wonderful and blessed journey to happily ever after.